do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
