sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
