the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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