You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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