there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
