currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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