I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Randomize
