So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize