I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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