So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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