Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
No subtext here. People are naked.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
