Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
