There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize