you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize