she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
