I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
