he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
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He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
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We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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