That's intense
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize