Have you finally orgasmed yet?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize