Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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