Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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