My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
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I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
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If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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