you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize