next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
He passed out mid-signature
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize