Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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