Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize