from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Randomize
