The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
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