So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
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I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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