She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
foreskin is a definite game changer
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
