I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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