I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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