ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
