She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
