ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
