i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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