I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
