The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
