2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
