He uses pillows to masturbate.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Success! We fucked roommates!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
