love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
