I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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