i think my tv is drunk
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
handjob tips. give me some.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
