Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize