Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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