Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week