found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
