Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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