So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
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But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
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My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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