Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I just cut my nipple shaving
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Randomize
